—ALL I DID WAS BOW DOWN.  ALL I DID WAS STAY STILL

…Some people have all the answers.  Me, I’ve just got questions.

…When someone asks you if you’re serious, it usually means they’re not really paying attention.

…“All we’re really given is the sunshine and our names.”

…Just because something has your name on it, doesn’t mean it’s yours.

…I’m alway suspicious when ppl say, “You sound really good,” and even more so when they say, “You look really good.”

…Do you ever wonder if ppl say what they really mean?  I do.

…All fiction is non-fiction, but we don’t always know it.

…If I could make you into a book, you’d be the best book ever.  You’d be a best-seller, the great American novel, only non-fiction. 

…I’ll admit that I have trouble making eye contact with certain ppl, and that I don’t know what that says about me.

…I’m never going to feel sad again is something I should probably never say.

…Call me sexist, but there’s nothing worse than seeing a woman cry.  Especially if you’re the reason for their tears. 

…Sometimes it’s advantageous to have a poor sense of smell.

…The Sixth Sense still holds up.  Watch it, and you’ll see.

…It’s very challenging to OD when you’re sober.

…Sober has a cold ring to it, unless you’re an addict who’s been sober for some time.

…That bottle is dancing by itself, and I’ve got nothing to do with it.

…Wicka, wicka, what?

…“Remember that time we found your mom’s valium, and took it?” 

…Pretending not to hate (…) is so exhausting.  I might as well work out, run a marathon, climb the stairs or Mount Everest.

…I have a best friend who climbs mountains for fun.  That’s hard to believe, in more ways than one.

…Walk it back—there’s a lot you can interpret in those three words.

…If you’re gone for forty-eight hours and no one notices you’re gone and no one’s called the police, that tells you everything you need to know.  

…I hate crying babies on planes, not because they’re annoying, but because they sound like they’re being tortured by the sky that doesn’t care.

…Sometimes when I cry it’s like the tears are sprigs of blood pulsing out of my heart through the wrong chamber.

…I’ve got dozens of poems and stories I could be posting here and yet I’m making you suffer with all this nonsense.  Does that make me a masochist?  Probably, but in reality I’m a pacifist and a pretty nice guy.

…Here’s what I’m thinking right now:  You and I go good together.