--O TRAMPLED DEATH, WHERE IS YOUR STING NOW?
…Strange morning. I woke without remembering who I was. So today I am my own shadow.
…Sometimes it’s as easy as turning on the light, and
still, I don’t do it.
…You can only miss someone when they are present to
you.
…Always in the back of my mind: I had tried, but had I
tried hard enough?
…There are many ways of proceeding, but of course you
want the one that is denied to you.
…Knock it off, said my mother. Stop worrying so much. The future doesn’t belong to us and we don’t
belong to it.
…And what about you?
How have you survived so far?
…Forget it. It’s
okay. You weren’t listening, even though
I really was trying to tell you something important.
…You could say blue forever and not be lying.
...“I wish I could show you when you are lonely the astonishing
light of your own being.” That quote
from Shiraz is one of my favorites.
…Whether you know it or not, I’m here holding you in
the rain.
…But don’t you think we’re always the same, making the
same mistakes, hurting exactly the same way?
…I have tried to live that way, sunny side up, rainbow
kitten surprise, everything bouncy like it is on the moon. It worked for a while, but then gravity came
into play.
…Do you make me sad? Of course not, silly. Just the opposite.
…People who read this think I’m quite sad. Other people read it and think I’m a little
nuts. What am I to do?
…I’m not really looking for what makes sense anymore. The surreal is where it’s at. I want to live inside a dream with my eyes
and mouth wide open, like a child trying to catch hail pellets in her mouth.
…I never understood why people who get drunk-dialed
get upset with the caller. I mean, doesn’t
that show you how much they care?
…It wasn’t always going to be like this. You were going to be a king, outlive everyone,
join the family, if you hadn’t already. Thank
God none of that worked out.
…As I’m writing this, Pete the eagle just swooped down
and pulled a fish from the lake. Pretty
good theater. Better than most TV shows
anyway.
…It’s funny what people hear when they read something
versus what they hear when the same thing is said to them. Just shows you how important body language is
in the scheme of things.
…To know my pain, you have to want what I want but not
have it.
…The reality is I came without a warranty.
…The best way to get a jump on the morning is to never
fall asleep. Unfortunately, doing that enough is the best way to get a jump on
an early death.
…Doesn’t it always seem that it’s when you think about
it that things go wrong?
…The doctor told me that faults run through all of us,
that scars extend far beneath the skin.
...Sticks and stones…That is so not true.
…Must be present to win…Also not true. Not always, anyway.
…Glorious moments, those are the best. Be sure to have as many of them as you can.
…Yesterday I saw the most darling little girl,
probably two and a half. She looked like
a cherub, like a ghost child. She was so
beautiful and perfect looking it was almost painful.
…Yesterday my depression and I had a good long chat.
We were actually honest with each other. That’s why I have all these bruises this
morning.
…I keep re-reading that last note to convince myself that
I really meant what I said.
…I’ve got the lights on, but it’s still pretty dark
around here.
…I’ve got sixteen days, sixteen of those are nights…
…Keeping that tab open all day is kind of weak, but
hey, what’re you gonna do?
…In my mind, I made you failproof, and that was a big
mistake.
…Love has made me everything I am--a coward.
…I’m sorry. Another
cabernet? Some cheese perhaps? Or mixed nuts?
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