—I GO OUT ALL NIGHT AND SLEEP ALL DAY

 

 

Jilted

 

She finds hair in her cereal bowl, strands like a tangle of Daddy Long Legs. Each flake is a waterlogged raft going nowhere. Nonetheless, her Lilliputian sisters slap at the milky lake, vying for purchase until their mother dumps the bowl down the sink, turns on the garbage disposal, lightening the load yet again. 

 

 

 

Match

 

My wife dates a stunt double now. Their sex is rambunctious yet fraudulent. He looks like “bad boy” me, packing five extra inches. When the set designer asks for better lighting, I make myself into a match, set myself on fire, wait to see if cinders are enough.