--I HAVE MASTERED THE ART OF FALLING
Talk To Me
He calls me Cricket, says I’m cute as a bug,
the best girlfriend he’s ever had. He plays connect-the-dots with my
freckles, across my shoulders, then my face.
He says I’m his first love, his last, just like that, without irony,
without blinking. It’s so hot on the boat dock I can’t breathe.
It’d be nice to believe him. I
don’t.
He shucks his shorts, grins. “C’mon, let’s go skinny dipping!”
I shake my head, look away before his grin
fades.
Splash.
“C’mon,” he yells. “While we’re
young!”
I want to say something mean and clever. How that was funny when Rodney Dangerfield
said it, but not now. I can’t think
what.
He climbs out dripping, pissed. In five minutes I’m not Cricket anymore. Now it’s Prude. Shitty Girlfriend. You Suck.
I could call him back, lose my suit, what’s it
matter. I don’t know. I take off my sunglasses, squint at the
sun. It’s a white fruit stand
cherry. It’s seen everything— dinosaurs,
Jesus, all four Beatles alive.
“Talk to me,” I say. “Tell me.”
I don’t hear anything.
Tango Lessons
“I like your hair messy,” he says. “You look like a woman who could find her way
out of a fox hole.”
He
chuckles his big beaver laugh. He has
hairy knuckles and shins. He belches up
bologna and cherry-flavored cough drops.
She
says, “You could kiss me differently, you know.
Tender–like.”
“If
I wanted to, I could. Yeah.”
A
smear of toothpaste encrusts one side of her mouth, white and crackled like
seagull droppings.
“What
about dance lessons?” she asks. “You
said we’d learn how to tango?”
“What
do you think we’ve been doing all these years?”
He
scratches his armpits and says he might have a rash. He takes the last beer and tells her to hit
the market for more.
She
gets her coat and keys. He lifts his
beer can in goodbye, seated on the sagging couch in his boxers and wife beater,
back to her.
She
pulls the garrote out of her handbag, tightening each end around her hands, her
only regret that it was rope and not barbwire.
Whenever it rained the animals got
to talking: the cockatoos whispering in their Ethel Merman sopranos while
preening their plumage, the nocturnal hamsters stepping off the treadmill to
hover in a hill of straw like hairy hoodlums, the cats slinking to a canopied
spot behind the couch, all three of them—Dinky, Dinky Do, and Dinky Do 2—mewling
and squalling. Even the outsiders became
verbose; squirrels chattering, birds peeling a sort of fluted screech, the fish
in the lake leaping out of water and putting their point across quick before
splashing back in the drink.
I
think now how dissimilar we were from them, us always sullen in the rain
because it recalled slick pavement and the accident. I wonder if we had talked then, like the
animals, if things might have ended different.
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