—IF YOU’RE BORED, MAYBE GIVE ME A HEAD START 

  

…24 

hours in a day.

No more. No less. That’s all 

I have to work with. To do my 

best to keep my thinking in 

check. To pray often. To trust 

that God cares about me and 

wants me to succeed. To hold 

on and not give up. To do for 

others what I can. To give God 

my weaknesses and triggers. 

To grow humility and a deeper 

gratitude. To have peace at the 

end of every day.

  --sign in Ocean Park, WA, first thing you see when you walk in to begin your first day of recovery

 

 … “I was voted Ugliest Girl on the school bus in sixth grade. It was painful. I went home sobbing and said to my parents, ‘I’m never going to school again.’ My father sat me on his lap, picked up my chin and said, ‘You’re the most beautiful girl in the world to me.’ It helped—a little.”

     “My father always pushed me to try. When I was 19 and wanted to go to Paris and model, my mother was hesitant. But my father was like, ‘Here’s some money! Here’s your ticket!' There’s no harm in trying, he taught me. So, I did.”

--Lorraine Bracco

 

…What matters? Everything.

 

…The other night I went through nearly all of the photos in my phone, cleaning things up. In almost every one, I look so grabby, as if I’m desperate for affection and can’t let go.

 

…You don’t look the same, but look at you now.

 

…Kids can be cruel, but so can adults. And when either are, it’s always about them, not you. Try to remember that.

 

…Watching someone try to eventually score a goal in soccer is like foreplay that never goes anywhere.

 

…I woke up feeling so grateful this morning—grateful for everything I’ve been given and everything I’ve experienced. That’s a feeling I wish I had more often, and, yeah, I know who’s to blame when it doesn’t happen.

 

…It really is remarkable what taking a minute or two to write a heartfelt note can do.

 

…My favorite people, the ones I want to be around the most, the ones I trust the most, are those who aren’t afraid to be vulnerable, who let you see their ugly parts. Because I have mine, too.

 

…You appeared in 47 searches this week.

 

…You can try, but you can’t forgo everything.

 

…I guess most people have a Shylock in their lives, including me. So, I’m sorry for being such a dick about yours.

 

…Everyone has their own version of a story. And it’s not about getting it right or wrong. It’s about remembering what was so important when you felt it.

 

…The other day I turned on the television and Satan was literally on every station, so I switched it to the Spanish channel and left it there. We’re all trying to figure out our own ways of surviving this insanity.

 

…It can be really hard, I get that, but isn’t it always better if you just come out with it?

 

…When someone says, “Don’t take this the wrong way,” you know what they’re really saying, what they really mean. 

 

…Even a monster, no matter how stupid it is, knows what it’s doing. 

 

…I still don’t understand who decides these things, like why all of Ryan Adams’ music was pulled off of streaming yet you can find Kanye’s or Chris Brown’s entire catalog. 

 

…Even without the horrors of slavery or an acknowledged Caste System, “Know Your Place” is still very much a thing.

 

…I’m not the type to run up to a celebrity and ask for an autograph, yet when I saw Joanna Rakoff just sitting there at the bar, five feet from me, I became one of those assholes; I barged into the conversation she was having with a friend and gushed like a middle-schooler. I hope, in some way, she understood it was really just about how much her words affected me.

 

…A lot of times, I wish I wasn’t an introvert, that I could be Mr. Brightside in a crowd instead of the wallflower I am inside. But then I realize that’s someone else’s movie, that they have the spark and energy to make it happen, and I’m genuinely glad to sidle over to the coffee bar and stand there awkwardly.

 

…When you finally meet someone in person that you’ve known so well online and find out they’re the same person you thought they were, or even better, well, it really doesn’t get much better than that. I mean, how could it? 

 

...It wasn’t in a romantic way, but last week someone told me I was easy to love. I’m not so sure about that.

 

…You have to be something of an artistic savant to make rhyming poetry not suck. 

 

…Also, it’s always challenging to make “heartstrings” happen in a poem. 

 

…A lot of times I think to myself: Get over yourself already.

 

…You can tell how much someone cares about you by how many questions they ask when you’re with them.

 

…I learned so much about ego last week.

 

…There’s a last time for everything, but we won’t ever know.

 

…There’s worry, and then there’s the worry you have for your kids.

 

…Having to edit your thoughts before you share them for fear of how they may, or may not, be received—that’s a kind of hell into itself. 

 

…Sometimes it’s like—Jesus, really?

 

…People always seem shocked when I tell them I’m a Christian. And I, get it, how Christians are portrayed, and that I’m pretty flawed. But if someone put a gun to my head and asked me to denounce my belief or be shot, I’d let them pull the trigger. Go ahead and judge me if you want.

 

…There’s nothing without context.

 

…It’s a long game and they’re gonna tell you it’s not.

 

…You never look good trying to make someone else look bad.

 

…“I went on a date with a guy who spent the entire time psychoanalyzing me. I naively thought he was trying to fix me (not good either) because he liked me. Back then I was still turning to others for acceptance/approval. (I don’t know if that ever entirely goes away but that inclination is far less for me now.) The next day he texted me that I just wasn’t a fit for him, but he wished me luck. This was after he pulled so much information out of me. I felt exposed and like a fool. I’ll always remember that guy. It was a great lesson. People need to earn your stories and vulnerabilities. And one can’t fix you. That’s an inside job, thank God.” Jasmine Love

 

…If you think about it, it’s extraordinarily rare to be able to trust someone. I mean, like trust sharing all of your bad parts and having no fear doing so.

 

…I don’t know why I always think of the right thing to say after it’s too late.

 

…“Never worry about being obsessive. I like obsessive people.

Obsessive people make great art.” Susan Sontag

 

…I’m only good at the games I play alone.

 

…You can’t blame the thunder for sounding like that. It’s got a lot to be angry about.

 

…I’ve realized lately that when I get really upset with someone, I’m actually just angry at myself. 

 

…“For the life of me” is a pretty dramatic (and yes, clichéd) way to start off a sentence, yet how can people do it? Stand him, I mean? 

 

…I always thought blurbs were kind of bullshit, but after a few of the books I read recently, I’m now convinced.

 

…Again, what’s so bad about wanting to be seen?

 

…I think my daughter might be right: my drug is other people’s happiness.

 

…“I do my best because I’m counting on you counting on me.” Maya Angelou 

 

…Whenever I’m criticizing someone in my head now, I try to stop and remember I’ve been that petty before, too.

 

…“The only thing more embarrassing than writing more than one book is writing that first book.” William Minor

 

…Why am I so bad at saying No? I guess it’s just another weakness.

 

…I have to remind myself that not everyone’s going to love the things I love as much as I do, or even at all. And that’s okay.

 

…Even on those mornings I miss him swimming, it’s still a comfort to know the beaver’s out there in the lake. 

 

…“BE BRAVE FRIDAY

Here's a big truth about me (big truths are sometimes brave): Sometimes I have absolutely no clue what I'm doing, but I do it anyway. 

Here's another one: I am okay with just being me. People are constantly trying to toughen me up, telling me to be fiercer, more outspoken, less (cough) milquetoast. 

I am someone who has nightmares about M.T. Anderson telling you that you can't read your passport and you're going to miss your plane or Amy King saying, 'Carrie! HURRY UP!' 

Nightmares aside, I'm okay with just being me. Someone who keeps trying. Someone who is sort of naive about the world sometimes and who keeps consistently forgetting how evil things can be. Someone who still hopes. Someone who uses big colors and big emotions to live. Someone who believes in magic. 

I hope, I really hope, that all of you can be okay with you, too. Sometimes it is an act of bravery to be that way, but the thing is? You get used to it once you do it a lot. 

It's okay to be you. 

Really. 

Even when other people want you to be something else. You can be you.”

--Carrie Jones

 

…“Behind every good drawing are a hundred bad drawings, so get to work.” Lynne Knight

 

…Lucky you. Lucky you.