—LORD I’M NO ANGEL. I’M NO STRANGER TO THE DARK

 

 

Fight Song—Joshua Mohr

 

 

--If you have to explain your sign, then it’s a shitty sign.

 

--Rum: the other white meat.

 

--Tonight, let’s remember that we’re lucky to be alive.

 

--Men love to say they’re trying. But really, you either do something or you don’t. Trying is for babies learning to walk.

 

--Nerves are good. They mean you’re starving for victory.

 

--Let’s cool it with the moping. We’re here to live a little, right?

 

--Maybe that’s all anybody is really after: effort.

 

--She looks like a demented sex-ed teacher trying to scare kids into abstinence. 

 

--I like the way you say “testes.” Can I hear it once more, except this time, make it a little breathier, like you’re seducing me?

 

--Your ass is writing checks your mouth can’t.

 

--Happy memories don’t have to be of happy times.

 

--Life coaches are not supposed to kidnap magicians.

 

--You’re trying and you’re lost. That’s not a winning combination.

 

--Everything gets worse. It’s one of the perks of life.

 

--Listen, I’m only one man.

 

--If there’s ever a time to go sentimental, it’s tonight.

 

--If anything is utterly obvious to Coffen, it is that he has to stop lying to himself.

 

--I’m a sorcerer. I could have made her clit grown to the size of a pie tin.

 

--You are safe, but you are vulnerable. That’s the balancing act.

 

--“He’s not a man.”

--“Sure, he is, but he’s also so small he can’t hurt me, and that’s what I’ve always wanted.

 

--Getting rid of his guilt is like sucking venom from a wound. 

 

--But do me a favor and make this the dumbest thing you ever do. The world already has plenty of psychotics. Get your shit together.

 

--Your paranoia has paranoia.

 

--Lately, life’s one gigantic cartoon and all I see are cops and monsters.

 

--Treading water is harder than it looks.

 

--It’s all so fragile, right? I mean we’re all so fragile.

 

--I really need that dental bib.

 

--Why not? Why wait one second longer?