—I’M CRAZY ABOUT YOU.  NUTS!

                  The Blurry Infinite

        I wanted to be there with you when the fog swelled, when your world turned into a blurry infinite, and the drop box you fell through curled its gnarled finger like a ready fix. 

I wanted to strap the jackals on my back, declaw that murder of crows constantly pecking at your bedroom window, burn them alive and show you they were gone for good.

I wanted to be the one to paint your toe and fingernails, soap the diaphanous bruises on your skin that only curious ghosts could see.

I wanted to count breaths with you, eat an entire sunset, coax the moon into singing for us alone.  I wanted to have your laugh ring in my ears for weeks.

Today, I wanted to tell you Happy Anniversary, see what the words did to your face, your shoulders and neck, but for now I’ll just say it to the ether and place the flowers on your empty side of the bed.