—THIS IS ABOUT AS HARD AS I CAN TRY

 

…There you go and go and go. 

 

… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kmpyfDF_pes&start_radio=1

 

…. Tiniest moves you make, the whole damn world shakes… Tiniest twist of fate.

 

…Look who’s on the edge again.

 

…I wish it could just be us for a little while.

 

...“We only bother to argue with people we love, you know that right?” Araminta Hall

 

…Well, in the moment you weren’t all that kind.

 

…You know what? That’s a great question. Let me ask my friend for an anaswer.

 

…I don’t think you know what scared is like.

 

…You can’t really believe you’re going to be anonymous forever, can you?

 

…I could have been better,

 

…All right, I’ll stop having fun. You’re right—it’s over-rated.

 

…I can definitely be petty. It’s not something I’m proud of.

 

…As far as abrupt endings go, that was a doozy.

 

…Just keep writing. It’ll come to you eventually.

 

…The problem with timing is you can’t take back what’s been already seen, or felt.

 

…I hope you’re right this time.

 

…But did you ever hear, “I Wanna Get Better”?

 

…One thing I’m certain of is--there’s no Tacoma in our future.

 

--Len, it would be amazing if you could examine your life like you do everyone else you meet.

--Yeah, I know,

--Yeah, you know what? What do you know? 

--I know.

--What do you fucking know?

--I don’t know.

--You’re impossible. You’re a fucking idiot.

 

…Everything must die for anything to matter.

 

…That kid at dinner who I’ll never see again, she wasn’t even three, but she thought I was funny.

 

…Hey, hey?

 

…Hey, I’ve got more. Why can’t you just look?

 

…Come a little closer. There is something I can tell, yeah.

 

…This is gonna be good. I just need to change a hundred things before I write about them.

 

…Who knew?

 

…Guess I should have. What an idiot.

 

…Because the love, the love, the love, the love I gave, wasted on a nice face.

 

…Smoke and mirrors are really a thing.

 

…If everything happens for a reason, I’ve got a lot of questions.

 

…You know what’s not getting us anywhere? Bullshit cliches.

 

…I guess I just got lucky again. But you’re lucky, too. Oh, yeah you are.

 

…We can say anything now because all the words sound different.

 

…Every time I close my eyes, I see you written in big lights.

 

…Oh, God, we barely survived.

 

…If we can’t be friends, we can’t be anything.

 

…Fuck off are the words that come to mind.

 

…I’m going to waste it all on someone else.

 

…Okay. I’m done now.

 

…Is this Up or is this Down? You tell me.

 

…Did you really do that?

 

…Okay, this is good enough. This is fine leaning into good.

 

…Sticky fingers are no one’s friend.

 

…I know what you’re supposed to do. But how do I do it?

 

… But when it’s a bad day, we know a good day is coming, eventually. 

 

…I don’t know how to survive this, other than to wait.

 

…“The purpose of life is to be defeated by greater and greater things.” Rilke

 

…I’ve seen this movie before and I didn’t like it the last nineteen times either. 

 

…It’s nice to be missed.

               “Oh, wow! A bottle of gasoline!”

 

…Before you throw the brick, at least let me close the windows.

 

…That’s what they call a cold surrender.

 

…Saying it right isn’t always the same as thinking it right.

 

…You remember things differently. Of course you do. It’s to be expected.

 

…Time is the last thing I want to kill.

 

…“Everything that I’ve been rewarded for takes a lot of people.” Harry Styles 

 

…On the one hand, it’s a sad, sad world. On the other hand, it’s not.

 

…For the record, I’m not a fan of public restrooms.

 

…You should give those flowers to someone else.

 

…Lucky me, to be alive and remember all the bad stuff.

 

…“Poetry is mostly this, pointing at what’s barely there, the way the finest lace is mostly holes.” Dobby Gibson

 

…I think I know that. I should know that, right?

 

…I love Reba McEntire because you have to love Reba McEntire. Not loving her would be like disavowing your grandmother. But even though I love her, I will say—never watch her TV show.

 

…Today’s word is tender.

 

…Apparently, I’m not the only one who has grumpy days. Yay.

 

…Don’t feel sorry for yourself. Only assholes do that.

 

…No one can run a marathon for you.

 

…I bet he’s dying to know.

 

…My job here is just to remain a person who shared their feelings unabashedly, even if that turns out to be a humiliating experience.

 

…Good questions are almost always more interesting than answers.

 

…Someone’s going to tell you differently, and you should listen.

 

…If you looked at my desk and picked up the slices of paper I’ve written on, you’d be worried for me. You might even call the cops. 

 

…I guess it wasn’t what we expected.

 

…It’s probably not a good idea to mix in the word “tinkering” when you’re describing someone’s dream.

 

…All right, where are we keeping the really big ones?

 

…Can I just say, I’m sorry, and that’s it?  

 

…The easiest way to mess it up is to try too hard.

 

…I wonder if you might have any advice to pass onto me as a man, an introvert who can fake it as an extrovert, and someone who wonders if they’re seeing life all wrong. 

 

…I admit it—I don’t really know what I’m doing.

 

…And I think if someone confessed the same thing—that they didn’t know what they were doing—I’d probably become best friends with them.

 

…I can be a bastard all right.

 

…I guess I’m wondering—How is that possible?

 

…There are no words are still words.

 

…“That’s the hardest thing about becoming a poet, tomorrow you have to wake up and become one all over again.” Dobby Gibson

 

…I was reading an article in RUNNER’S WORLD about how humans keep getting faster, breaking every speed record, and I wondered if we can do that why can’t we speed up finding a cure for cancer? 

 

…There’s a thrill reading someone else’s diary. 

 

…People have a really hard time meeting deadlines.

 

…I think we’re all a bit pigheaded.

 

…It’s a little too late in the evening for picking new friends.

 

…“One of the important things for humans is to embrace the contradiction.” Haruki Murakami

 

…I’ve been working on you all week (if you didn’t notice) and I’ve been working on my all my life.

 

…Are you really still there? Oh, yeah. Forgot for a sec.

 

…To return to the main menu, please press pound.

 

…“You deserve somebody who knows how hard it is to find somebody like you.” M. Anthony

 

…There’s something wrong with this headline:

David Zaslav to Receive Estimated $887 Million in Compensation Related to Warner Bros.-Paramount Merger

Amount includes $335 million tax reimbursement for the exec

 

…This is the part where it’s best to say as little as possible.

 

…As mornings go, this one is going, going, gone.

 

…It’s anybody’s guess as to how this all ends.

 

—THAT GHOST’S A KID INSIDE A SHEET

 

Adolescence

 

To conserve energy 

Mother used to hang 

our shadows on 

the clothesline—

stained or otherwise. 

It gave the dragon flies 

a good laugh. 

On windy days, 

there was no telling 

a whistleblower 

from a priest, 

a neighbor from a 

sex offender. 

Even the mosquitos 

wore rubber gloves.

 

—READY AS I’LL EVER BE

 

Prompted

The writing prompt is sick of being stuck in ink, sick of being stared at and used like a sex worker who gets stiffed after the fact, so the writing prompt grows a pair (of legs) and walks through me like an apparition, only noticeable when it brushes one of my internal organs, but since I flunked science and biology, I don’t know the name for most of my gluey insides though I can feel the writing prompt setting up shop within my ribs, building a campfire, about to perfectly toast a triplet of S’mores dangled by a snapped tree twig, and the writing prompt seems satiated enough, angst-free whistling a Bee Gees tune, You Should Be Dancing, and after a while I jump in with piping falsetto that would make Barry Gibb proud so that it feels like the writing prompt and I are now both boogying across my chest cavity, inside the bone ossuary, taking turns doing dancefloor splits and pointing our index fingers heavenward or toward a ceiling that’s not there, and after a few hours when I should be exhausted, the writing prompt and I slow dance to a Bruno Mars song about forgetting to buy flowers, and both of us are weeping like forlorn boy scouts who can’t figure out how to tie the right kind of knot, so I whisper, It's okay, everybody needs someone, because I saw some French actor say that in subtitles once, and the writing prompt whispers back, Write it down, and I say, What? That’s stupid, and the prompt says, It’s not stupid to everyone, and I say, But—, and the prompt says, I’m not going to tell you again. 

 

—I DIDN’T KNOW I WAS LONELY UNTIL I SAW YOUR FACE

  

…That person who’ll show up at 2am when they shouldn’t—that’s a keeper for life.

 

…Two percent is not nothing. It’s something.

 

…Apparently I’m shrinking.

 

…That book’s not going to read itself.

 

…Someone actually asked me who Sparky is. (Thanks for reading. Seriously.)

 

…Most times when people say, “Thank you for sharing this” about your writing, what they’re not saying is, “This sucks and I’m not sure how to not say it sucks without hurting your feelings.”

 

…I think I’m done with doctors and that they’re done with me, God bless every one of them.

 

…“Angels can fly because they take themselves lightly.” Jean Coceuco.

 

…April’s going to be interesting.

 

…There’s a lesson there, and a lesson in most things if you pay enough attention.

 

…The anger has to go someplace.

 

…I need to get better at letting things go.

 

…“It may be true that everything 

has already been said, 

but it’s just as true that not everyone 

has had a chance to say it.”

            —Dobby Gibson

 

…Even if you’re feeling especially jolly, dancing on a treadmill is probably a bad idea.

 

…Maybe I just need someone to remind me that the world’s beautiful.

 

…How lucky we are that we have each other.

 

…The problem is thinking you’re twenty-one when you’re far from it.

 

…“Everywhere we play the roles of characters dressed exactly as ourselves, though unconvincingly.” Dobby Gibson

 

…I’m here but I’m not.

 

…What are you reading?

 

…Jimmy doesn’t recognize his country.

 

…The hardest thing about dreams is explaining them to other people.

 

..“Seems like the world flows better when you really love someone. Screw what everyone else thinks, ‘cause Honey, if you feel good, you look good.” Shay Hixon

 

“I understand there’s a problem you need made a million times worse?”

 

…If I’m ever not here going on two weeks, you should call 911.

 

…Even when it’s not, poetry is always about love.

 

…“It is still the most popular subject of all time: love.” Dobby Gibson

 

...Sometimes it depends on the mirror. Sometimes a mirror is like a bad friend you don’t want to talk to or see anymore.

 

…It must be very awkward being the only one at the party.

 

…Just like you, I can’t leave.

 

…Do what you want, just don’t go dark on me.

 

…It’s probably a smart move to keep something plugged in.

 

…I don’t think you know who you’re dealing with here.

 

…The other day I learned there’s a gun shop in Woodinville called “Precise Shooter.” That kind of creeped me out.

 

…Many days it takes a lot of guts (or stupidity) to look at Facebook and not close the thing out.

 

…“Lack of communication can ruin a lot of good shit.” Shay Hixon

 

…The words you use matter, whether you realize it or not.

 

…All these years later, and I still can’t figure out how to do it the right way.

 

…Abnormal is always a shocking word when you get your results back, even if you don’t understand the numbers.

 

…I guess you’ll have to tell me what it all means.

 

…Wow, that’s a first.

 

…You’d never know Ukraine is still getting bombed every day.

 

…“I just let them guess how old I am and then no matter what they say I say right back, ‘Damn, you’re good at this’.” Shay Hixon

 

…Lately I’ve been having those dreams that are you impossible to describe that, if you try, the person kind enough to listen will think you’re nuts.

 

…When I told my kids I was done going to concerts you would have thought I told them they were adopted. They didn’t take it well.

 

…The point is—you decide.

 

…Social media can really kill a person.

 

…Bad tattoos are just bad tattoos, but I hope they’re really special for you.

 

…“Twice a day, for thirty seconds, tell someone how important they are to you, and why.” 

 

…Symbolism only makes sense if you want it to.

 

…Are you kidding me? What have I got to bitch about?

 

…I wonder if I would save his life, I had the chance to. 

 

…I guess I wondered why the, “WOW!”

 

…You get the news you get.

 

…It’s hard to write something about love and not feel like a poseur. But you should do it anyway.

 

…My friends keep telling me what an imbecile he is, and I already know that, but I join in on the conversation, and then I get amped up and I just want to rip a building apart.

  

…You could have done that, too, if you’d really wanted to.

 

…Might be time to pack it in. The wind’s stopped.

 

…Timing…

 

…I’ve never been a huge Jack Kerouac fan, but I know they’re out there. On March 12^th, which would have been Jack’s 104^th birthday, the “On the Road” scroll sold for $12.1 million at an auction making it the most expensive literary manuscript ever. Twenty-fiveyears prior, the owner of the Indianapolis Colts bought it for a (then) record of $2.4 million.

 

…It’s 7:30. We can laugh later.

 

…Maybe I don’t wanna know. Do you? 

 

…I’m awake, right? Maybe. Might be.

 

…If it’s in writing, you can’t deny it.

 

…“Before he left, he asked if I ever felt lonely here and I said, Of course not, I’m a writer.” Timothy Liu

 

--You know what I need?

--A hug?

--More paper.  

 

—I’LL BE BETTER THAN I WAS BEFORE

 

No Telling What

 

The morning sun is a 

squalling newborn demanding

attention behind the blinds. 

There’s no telling what 

will happen today. Last night 

a swarm of invisible frogs 

sang an opera of protest,

waiting to be noticed 

in the dark because 

who doesn’t want to be noticed? 

The day before, I was stuck 

on a bridge with five million 

other vehicles while stray dogs 

weaved between our cars 

until the guy on the ledge 

couldn’t take any more 

honking and leapt. I wrote a 

poem about it in longhand

and left the note folded inside 

the right cup of the bra you 

put on before work. At the door,

you kissed me dutifully and

might have even detected

I was naked like our first time.

 

—THAT’S ABOUT AS HAPPY AS IT GETS

 

Maybe

Maybe I just need someone to remind me that the world’s beautiful, how you can’t find laughter on a lake anywhere else, feet running down the dock boards, a joy sound in the thump-thump-thump they make before liftoff and splash. Everyone has a war story, and these days they’re literally war stories—shrapnel turning bodies into nothing more than morbid pasta, a mother’s wail battling for space with shrieking sirens. It happens and it’s tragic, something you can’t unhear or unsee, just take a look around. So, I am wrong to want to watch a cone of butterflies twirl almost-drunkenly over a backyard bush? Smell some honeysuckle? Spot some stray deer or cocky eagle lollygagging in the sky? Is it horrible to want to make a baby gurgle and smile back? Tell its mother how lucky she is? Promise her that it just gets better and better? I’m asking in all sincerity; is it indecent or is it permissible to believe life is still worth it?

 

—I WANNA GET BETTER

 

…“In March, I’ll be rested, caught up and human.” Sylvia Plath

 

…I put a helmet on a helmet.

 

…“May we keep looking for beauty in unexpected places.” Sam Davis

 

…No one gets tired of hearing someone say they love you.

 

…If you say it’s poetry, it’s poetry.

 

…“Writing, I think, is not apart from living. Writing is a kind of double living.” Catherine Drinker Bowen

 

…I started collecting rejections again. Got nothing else to do.

 

… The thing I love and the thing you love can be completely different but sit side by side.

 

…I tried to pull up my sleeve and accidentally punched myself. Pretty sure I had it coming.

 

…We look at our faces like we don’t know who we are.

 

…The back stroke is the hardest one of all. Especially without water.

 

…I hear people get better with practice.

 

…Don’t forget to float.

 

…This is a game you should never bet on.

 

…“It’s so rare to have someone take care of you, to feel like nothing is going to run out.” Grant Faulkner

 

…“I would rather my suffering have a name, my pain have a face, a chance for familiarity.” Amy Marques

 

…The thing about a highway is its always going somewhere.

 

…Let’s do something we’ll regret.

 

…A gift is a hope.

 

…How does it feel to always get what you want? 

 

…“We’ve mistaken being in touch for being connected. It’s possible to text someone five times a day and still have little idea what’s happening in their life. It’s just noise we make at each other to maintain the illusion that we care.” Keisha Saunders-Waldron

 

…You’re a much better actor than me.

 

…It’s never as bad as it feels. 

 

…If you’re not prepared to listen to the answer, don’t ask.

 

…Change my meds, change the flight.

 

…Let’s just light one more sparkler.

 

…Don’t you dare touch the dial.

 

…Some expectations can be even worse than the real thing.

 

…Too late. The bullet got you.

 

--How was your day?

--Good.

--Same old, same old?

--I hate that expression.

--I hate when people just say “Good’ when I ask how their day was. 

 

…“Old people are not the other. They’re you. If you’re lucky.” Joan Price

 

“I hope you’ll come back someday, say something pretty to me. I want to hear something pretty. Even if you have to fake it.” Grant Faulkner

 

…You can shake your head, you can shake your ass, but that’s not changing anything.

 

…The US spent $11.3bn in just the first week of its military assault on Iran.

The cost of the first week of the Iran war would be more than enough to fully fund the Environmental Protection Agency this year (at $8.8bn), the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention ($9.2bn) or the National Cancer Institute ($7.4bn).

More than 3,000 people are believed to have been killed across Iran so far, the Pentagon says. A girls’ school in the south-eastern Iranian city of Minab lies in rubble, with about 175 children and teachers killed in a strike that the US is believed to have carried out. 

 

Pentagon seeks more than $200 billion in budget request for Iran war, administration official says

 

…At a rally in Kentucky, Trump mentioned how he tried to avoid slipping down the soaking-wet stairs: “I do it very slowly...because nobody cares if you set a speed record.” He then said he “admired” former President Barack Obama’s ability to walk downstairs — but then disparaged him, claiming that Obama’s “bob down the stairs” was “unpresidential.”

 

 

….Let’s take a look at “unpresidential” (in just a week), shall we?:

 

--Donald Trump Nicknames White House Correspondent 'Maggot' and Threatens to Sue Her, Along with The New York Times

--News Alert: President Trump threatens Iran leaders: ‘Watch what happens to these deranged scumbags today’

 

--From “Grand Theft Auto” to “SpongeBob SquarePants,” the White House has turned to memes from pop culture and video games to sell President Trump’s war with Iran

 

 

--A cellphone video captured Trump, who was visiting the Ford F-150 plant in Dearborn, twice mouthing “f--- you” as he pointed to someone calling up to him from the factory floor below. The president subsequently raised his middle finger toward the heckler as he continued walking. 

 

--In recent days, Trump has been road-testing attacks on Newsom’s dyslexia — which the governor recently wrote about in his new book — trying to portray Newsom as “a low IQ person” and “dumb.”

 

Trump has a history of seeking to define opponents — even Republicans — through repetition and ridicule, in an effort to distill political rivals into bite-sized caricatures.

During the 2016 Republican primary, he described Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) as “Lyin’ Ted” and Marco Rubio — who is now his secretary of State — as “Little Marco.”

During his 2016 race against Hillary Clinton, he dubbed her “Crooked Hillary.” During the 2020 and 2024 elections, he called rival Joe Biden “Sleepy Joe.” He called is 2024 presidential opponent, Kamala Harris, “dumb as a rock.”

 

 

--After Iran’s Kharg Island is demolished by missiles, Trump says US may hit Iran’s the island again ‘just for fun’

 

                               "Only twenty-one more years.”

…Last bit of “political” news and then I’ll be done for now—

This is how evil some in Isreal are, how little regard they have for the lives of anyone perceived to be their enemy somehow, even peace-loving protestors—

Senior Israeli officials have told U.S. diplomats that Iranian protesters will “get slaughtered” if they take to the streets against their government even as Israel publicly calls for a popular uprising, according to a State Department cable reviewed by The Washington Post.

The document’s authenticity was verified by two State Department officials.

In a televised address on the first day of the attacks, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said his country “will strike hard at the terror regime and create conditions that will allow the brave Iranian people to cast off the yoke of this murderous regime.”

 

…Here’s the thing—you have to stop on time.

 

…I’m not sure about this.

 

…Sometimes it’s best not to read back what you wrote.

 

…Dude, don’t fall anymore.

 

…Do you know what that is? Dangerous.

 

…Next month Willie Nelson releases his (true story, no typo) 159^th studio album.

 

…I think it’s bad juju to root against a friend, but someone needs to tell my “friend” that.

 

…Okay, well, I’ll fix it. I promise.

 

…I probably sigh more than any person alive. Don’t ask me why.

 

…Those trees are really shaking right now, doing the Bossa nova. If one comes down on me, I’m going to go with fate.

 

…You can find symbolism or signs anywhere, but reading them the right way is what matters. 

 

…If you’re whistling like that, in that way, to yourself, well, you might be in trouble.

 

...Maybe I should just turn in.

 

…I hate when it says there’s something there but there’s nothing there.

 

…I have no reason to complain, or whine, about anything. I really don’t. And I feel guilty when I do. I’m a first world country person. I have more than enough, way, way more than I ever thought I’d ever had. So why should I bitch when something is missing in life?

 

…I can’t cook, other than eggs or cold cereal. I admire people who can, and who actually like doing it, like my best friend, but isn’t it just easier to eat out or type in Uber Eats?

 

…Those trees are really rocking again. You can imagine them falling on you while you’re sleeping, or you can image them dancing. There’s almost always a choice.  

 

…I’m learning how important it is to be mindful, to be present in the moment, and yet there are moments when I still think—Fuck that.

 

…You can’t believe everything you think because if you did, like in my case, you’d be in big trouble.

 

…I work at being happy like some people work at being sad.

 

…If it’s 2 in the morning, 3 in the morning, 4 in the morning, and you still haven’t found what you’re looking for, it’s probably time to go back to sleep before someone thinks you’re insane.

 

…The thing about being up at 2am is no one judges you, no one cares.

 

…“I used to think it was silly or sappy to write down the things that I love. But once you start doing it, once you start deliberately taking time out of your day to write down things that are good, you start noticing them everywhere.” Melissa Kirsch

 

…A hurricane only holds together for so long.

 

…Just stay right here, dude. Don’t take another step.

 

…Good luck making sense of this.

 

…You won’t know what I mean unless you’ve been there, too. 

 

…Now I’m on a wire, no trick in my sleeve.

 

…Doesn’t this guitar sound so good?

 

…I don’t think I ever want to catch up to the letting go part.

 

…It was letting go of everything, but you.

 

…Well, it’s probably too late to knockoff a drug store, so might as well go to sleep.

 

… “And in case I don’t see you, good afternoon, good evening and good night.”