—I’VE BEEN STARING AT THE SUN FOR SIX WHOLE DAYS

 

…My hope is like a suntan—it looks really good for a while but always fades. 

 

…Sometimes I just wallow in it.

 

…On the flip side, there are a lot of cute babies being born every day.

 

…A few weeks back I was going to quit The Washington Post after their owner demanded that the paper’s opinion editor essentially stop giving his opinion on certain matters. But the publication has a column I love called The Optimist. I’d share links to some of my favorite columns, but you’d have to be a subscriber to open them. The most recent was about this local convenience store in a small town that carried a random array of items including VHS tapes which his best customer loved the most, especially the Disney movies. She has Down Syndrome and would come in every other day with her mom to pick out a film, most of which she had seen dozens of times. But then the store’s lease expired, rent got raised very high, and so he had to relocate. He’d been planning to scale down his assortment to increase profitability. But instead of eliminating archaic VHS tapes, he actually created a special spot that featured only Disney movies and above the shelves he put up a sign reading Christine’s Corner, named after his best (and favorite) customer. Christine and her mother had feared the store’s move, and so when they entered the new place on opening day and saw what the owner had done, well, there were a lot of joyful tears. Some were mine. The photograph is priceless.

 

…Some things are easy to disbelieve, but then there are others that, while they’re still hard to fathom, make you want them to be true. For instance, the notion that there are more stars in the universe than there are grains of sand on the earth—that’s something I hope is real.

 

…Yesterday was the first day of Spring and it rained. Boy was it pretty.   

 

…What’s scary is watching how fast the second hand can hustle.

 

…This is bliss, this is hell, forever is a feeling, and I know it well.

 

…It’s true—I’ve never met a hoodie I didn’t like.

 

…I’ve tried, but I still can’t describe to you what the word masculine means.

 

…It’s pretty hard to dislike a song with a ukulele in it. Most all of them are happy little ditties.

 

…I’m not a fan of dressing up pets. Every dog in a costume looks traumatized and defeated while their owner stands by with a dopey grin or a thumbs up.

 

…Don’t the majority of people watch films for the same reason they read, to escape into a different world for a while? Then why have they stopped reading? My theory is that they look at reading the same way they do a film with subtitles: it seems like it’ll be too much work, even though once you start watching, you almost forget you’re following along by subtitles.

 

…The problem with being overly superstitious is it doesn’t work most of the time.

 

…A writer I love a posted a short little video on social media entitled Hello my book is real and I cried showing her opening a box of her latest book and, yes, I got a little weepy right along with her. I can’t believe how adorable she was, crying and laughing and tossing the book up in the air, saying, “It’s a bit heavy, so even if you don’t read it, you can use all the pages to fan yourself when you’re too warm.” And it went on, even more adorable. It’s really rare to see something that authentic and vulnerable in my little corner of the world. 

 

…The full moon’s reflection rippling in the water—now there’s a sight.

 

…I saw a lone goose floating on the lake, which is also pretty rare because they always swim in groups, plus at this time of year, most of them are down south. Poor guy, I thought.

 

…As you know, I tend to be too superstitious. For a long time, I thought seeing a crow was bad luck. But then I found out how smart they are (crows, like elephants, are one of the few animals that can feel deep sadness, and grieve at the death of one of their own.) Now I feel lucky, like it’s a good sign, whenever a crow flies by. Yesterday I saw a whole flock. 

 

…“There’s something about creating that brings nurturing back into your life, where it reminds you that we are put on this earth to do more than just survive. In a world where we have so little control, I feel like being able to write a song is the one thing that I still have control over.” Brontez Purnell 

 

…I haven’t been super anxious in a spell, thank God. I wouldn’t wish anxiety on (almost) anybody.

 

…Maybe you know, but I had to look up what “bupkis” means.

 

…In checking out this year’s lineup for Lollapalooza I saw about 100 bands I’ve never heard of, one with the name People R Ugly.

 

…Sometimes it’s hard to remember things, yet it seems like it’s so easy to remember the things you’d like to forget. 

 

…“I can’t believe this is the job. Just plumb the depths and give it away!” Lucy Dacus

 

…Did you know that a lack of social connection has been shown to be as detrimental to one’s health as smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day?

 

…Whenever people say, “It’s not too late,” I always want to ask, “Are you sure?”

 

…Asking for a favor after being insulted is usually not a good idea. 

 

…Hey, is this all real? I say that to myself way too much anymore.

 

…When I asked ChatGPT: “Who is Len Kuntz?” it said, “I’m sorry. I don’t know anyone by that name.” 

 

…Somehow I’m staying off the floor. Yay.

 

…Posted on social media:

Pardon my crudity. Sorry not sorry.

Fun Fact: A blue whale's anus can stretch to about 3.5 feet in diameter—making it the second biggest asshole on the planet.

 

… “You write poems because you need a place where what isn’t may be.”  Alejandra Pizarnik

 

…People can hate on Amazon all they want, but you have to give them props for having a good thing going. It’s almost like all I have to do is just think about something I want, and it shows up at my door three hours later.

 

…I might be wrong, but it seems to me that you can usually tell how much someone cares about you by how many questions they ask.

 

… “When you start thinking about what people like, you start thinking about what people expect. Then you start pandering to people's expectations. Then you start talking about yourself in the third person. And then you end up overdosed in a hotel room. I learned very early on not to think about that. You go out there and do the best you can, and you do things that are interesting to you. Hopefully it will be interesting to other people. I don't want to be adequate. I'd rather fail gloriously making something strange, awesome but ultimately a failure.” --Anthony Bourdain

 

…I feel so bad for people who don’t have a personality, because I seem to have so many.

 

…I wonder if cancelling plans on someone is as painful for other people as it is for me. Something tells me it’s not.

 

…I’m intrigued with tattoos for all sorts of reasons, but someone has to explain the allure of a back tattoo to me.

 

… "I saw a crow building a nest, I was watching him very carefully, I was kind of stalking him and he was aware of it. And you know what they do when they become aware of someone stalking them when they build a nest, which is a very vulnerable place to be? They build a decoy nest. It’s just for you," Tom Waits

 

…I remember standing in the coffee line at my very first writer’s conference. Two people in front of me was this mantis of a woman, so frail that a strong wind might break a few of her bones. When she turned slightly, I realized it was Joyce Carol Oates. No one else even knew.

 

…“My painting is dead. I am not in the right place. I am not a painter.” Michelangelo, while painting the Sistine Chapel

 

…Who knew there were so many writers? But where are all the readers?

 

…A social media post yesterday:

PSA: If you don’t want your child to be gay, trans, etc., then just don’t have kids. This isn’t fucking build-a-bear. You don’t get to pick and choose these things about your child. You aren’t ready to be a parent if you aren’t ready to love them unconditionally.

 

…People who don’t care if they’re liked or not are people I’ve never met.

 

…How strange, to be a country without friends.

 

…I love Dylan, but I don’t think there is a single answer blowing in the wind.

 

…“Who is it that can tell me who I am?” Shakespeare, King Lear

 

…We only live once, if at all.

 

…I’m envious of people who can deal with conflict and not let it bother them afterwards.

 

…I’m one of the lone few who isn’t a Beatles fan. Nope. But I think Paul McCartney is the real deal. Anyone at his age and stage of acclaim (is there even a comparable person?) who still admits that’s he’s needy and looking for approval all the time is somebody I’d trust with just about anything. 

 

…“You blows who you is.” Louis Armstrong

 

…Good listening is more than just listening.

 

…When you start your day, do you expect something good to happen? Or do you just go about it not really expecting anything one way or the other?

 

…Where do you find your heroes, not someone perfect, but someone to emulate or at least look to when you need an example?  

 

…It’s important to remember how lucky you are. No matter what, you are lucky.  

 

…“There are notes between notes, you know.” Sarah Vaughan

 

…I used to be really good under pressure. When I think about those days, I don’t even believe it. Like maybe that wasn’t me. Now I’ve got to write a story by Monday, and I have the opening line, but every time I write further it’s just blob after blob of word salad.

 

…I guess no one can tell you you’re trying too hard except yourself.

 

…Respect is a heavy word, but really, isn’t it just prioritizing your actions according to how much you care about someone? 

 

…There are some stories you just don’t want to end, and then there are those you don’t want to know how they end.

 

…“I’m not sick, but I’m not well.” I’ve always loved that lyric by Harvey Danger. It’s clever and has a lot of legs. A lot of days I could wear a necklace with those words printed on it.

 

…"The worst? Easy. The man who comes in and as soon as you see or hear him you know he's saying, 'I am determined, no matter what happens, to have a miserable time tonight. Whether the food is great or not, and no matter what the wine and service are like, I will show off in front of my companions and make life hell for the waiter, because my life is all about power and I am a seriously unhappy jerk.' There are plenty of them. Everywhere. Them and the psycho food nerds. They take notes while eating, for Christ's sake. They're not the very worst but they're worrisome, demanding for the chef. Chefs and regular restaurant-goers are the best, and leave the best tips. I love other chefs." Anthony Bourdain

 

…I hope your Spring is off to a stellar start and that your weekend brings you all kinds of joy. Life has some hard knuckles, but there’s lots of joy, too. Let’s both look for some today.