—NOTHING EVEN MATTERS

 

…Hi, Monday. I have a lot of thoughts about you.

 

…Paying $250 for a shirt—even a great looking shirt--feels like letting someone spit in your soup and laugh about it behind your back.

 

…David Cassidy’s last words were, “So much wasted time.” But, like, wouldn’t that be anyone’s last words? Except maybe Richard Branson. 

 

…I wonder what would happen if people answered completely honestly when asked, “How are you feeling?”

 

…“Fail better.” Now there’s the perfect mantra.

 

…I was never good at smoking bongs. I’m not that good at breathing in…

 

…I wonder how many times you should hear, “How are you feeling?” before you check yourself in somewhere. 

 

…Did I mention I still miss Lucy?

 

…There’s always something to love.

 

…Yesterday I wrote a poem about how ugly my feet are. Now that’s stooping low for inspiration.

 

…Sometimes it’s shocking how sad I get.

 

…I could hear “Sunrise” a billion times on repeat and I’d never tire of it.

 

…I feel proactive. I pull out weeds. All of a sudden, I’m having trouble breathing in.

 

…I don’t think God created days just so you could scratch them off, but, well, some days…

 

…Does your computer do this: restart randomly, and make you then remember your thousands of passwords to every link you once had up on your screen? No? Lucky you.

 

…Oh no, the next thing I know, they call a triple 0.

 

…Don’t you just wish you could get inside certain people’s head and discover, “Oh, so that’s what the fuck you were thinking”?

 

…Of all the places I could be, why am I here with you?

 

…You said it was dangerous after Sunday. And I knew you loved me.

 

…Fishing, not out of need to feed yourself, but just for recreation, is a strange concept. I see these boats and sad men sitting in them and wonder why? 

 

…You’re very bad at explaining things. Just sayin’.

 

…Maybe we need a different exit.

 

…The less sense it makes, the more you matter.

 

…If you don’t mean it, please don’t give ppl any false hope.

 

…You’re scared and confused. I get that. I am, too.

 

…“Even though, in another life, you would have broken my heart, I would still like to do taxes and payroll with you.”

 

…What you did back there, it changed my mind.

 

…“Try peeing. It’s always a good distraction.”

 

…It’s 40 degrees and I feel like I’m dying.

 

…When your watch says, “Check your activity,” it’s really just calling you a P____y. Is saying “p___y” this way anti-feminist?  

..."Hey, Len, do you think if you went to see 'The V.M's' it'd just be you talking to yourself?"

 

…“Right” is a tiny box for people who don’t have any other answers.

 

…I’ve never wanted a different gender than the one I have.

And though you’re not going to believe me, I have wanted to experience being pregnant, child birth, and the rest, firsthand.

 

…I’m paying attention. Just look at me.

 

…My hands are shaky. My knees are weak. I can’t seem to stand on my own two feet. I’m breathing but I’m wheezing, feel like I’m emphysema-in.’

 

…What could possibly matter more than this conversation we’re having right now?

 

…Do you think this is funny?

 

…Whatever you’re thinking about doing, it’s enough.

 

…“What’s the end game?” is probably always a good question to ruminate over.

 

…Sometimes I really miss the Chemistry building. Well, actually, a lot of the time.

 

…“But does it have a gull?”

 

…“Do I have to throw rocks?”

 

…I have so many moles on my stomach now that it very much resembles an anthill.

 

…If I poked a pin in my ankle right now, I’d probably fly away to Nova Scotia, or at least to Everett.

 

… The paramedic thinks I’m clever because I play guitar. I think she’s clever because she stops people dyin’.

 

…Here we go again, right?

 

…How’s this for a new shirt?

 

…“Joy, why do you look so stupid?”

 

…It’ll all be better tomorrow. Right?

 

…Please give us a chance.