—SUNRISE, SHINE DOWN A LITTLE LOVE ON THE WORLD TODAY. MAKE A MORNING SO SWEET THAT IT’LL HAVE TO CHASE MY BLUES AWAY     

 

 

How Good I Am

 

I don’t want to wake up, yet I’m tired of being tired, I’m on hold needing to be held, fuck, and nothing’s funny anymore, while food tastes funny, while the air tastes toxic and quixotic, fuck, I haven’t laughed since I broke my fingers on the snout of your gun, and the day hasn’t even started yet, fuck, and I think there has to be a trapdoor somewhere, right? I feel like sharing a smoke with a stranger, though I don’t smoke, though any stranger will do, actually, a felon or foe, the water’s gunmetal gray and boiling on the brim, there’s sediment in my eyes, leftover from the Byzantine, and I feel like I’m constantly scratching a sunburn, fuck, I could tell you I’m over and done, because I’m just that skilled at lying, fuck, but hey, there’s a Leprechaun laughing on my chest, punching knuckles in my larynx, making me promise things I can’t even pronounce, which is a bit like feeling sorry for yourself when gold keeps falling at your feet, fuck, I’m so good at lying, (said twice, soon to be said thrice), just look at my two-faced mirrored-face, trade-marked smirk and requisite empathy, I must have filched my life from a magazine I didn’t even read, fuck, did I tell you how good I am? at lying? fuck, I’m certain I did, didn’t I?